Catulistiwa Jade

I’ll Never Love Someone Too Much Again…

Yuni and Seca,
are best friend who care about each other too much.
Yuni is a fine Javanese girl admires clever and humble Seca whom she always listened to.
Yuni wants to leave and work abroad though just as a female worker class to see the world wide.
Her parents couldn’t afford to send her to a university even if they might in case she’s insist but she just couldn’t do so. She knew that she’s not so smart either, so she burried those thoughts.
“I might not gonna make it like them either,” she thought desperately.
She come to see Seca and tell her those wishes.
“Ca, I really wanted to go, but my parents wouldn’t let me. Because I’m the last girl in the family, they wouldn’t let me go too far…”.
Seca knew that long time ago but there’s nothing she can do for her, not yet.
“I know, your parents loves you so much that they won’t let you. They’re afraid something might happened to you when you’re away and there’s nothing they can do to help.”
“I know, that’s way I stayed with them. But I want to be with you Ca, I would be you’re house keeper just as long we can be together for a while, it’s fine…”
Seca didn’t know whether she got to laugh or cry.
Yuni has no dream.
Everytime She ask her what she wanted to be, she simply just can’t figure out of anything.
Seca knows that she’s despert in her wasted youth. But though it would be very much fun to have her around, still she can’t bare to make her a house keeper.
Deep down inside she keep her promise that one day she’ll gonna help her best friend.
Yuni always came every holiday since then, though Seca couldn’t visit her back,.
One day, she just came with a different news : she’s going to get married.
Though there’s a little bit of sadness coz she’s still can’t keep her promises, Seca’s happy for her. At least, she though, Yuni’s gonna be happy.
Though she cannot go anywhere, at least she found someone who’s gonna make her happy.
It just about to be another ordinary time one day when she read a newspaper while hanging around with her companion.
She found Yuni’s name and where she live was mentioned there…
She tried to recognize the face but she couldn’t.
The age that being mentioned there was not the same. So she called to her office and got her answer…
On her way to her work to ask for her wedding’s day off, Yuni got an accident.
She passed away…
Seca knows that she had no right to be angry to God.
All that she listen in her head are excuse of why people keep telling that God loves good person and always take them back first.
She’s feels angry to her self.
Why that her best friend had to go at the time when she’s still nobody.
When there’s nothing she can do for her yet.
Why she was too busy with her self that she couldn’t see her preparing her wedding at the last moment of her life…?
Within her anger and sadness, she didn’t came to Yuni’s funeral.
She cannot bare to see her best friend burried away…
She saw Yuni’s unrecognized face on the newspaper.
For her it better to remember her the way she was last time they met.
They said that the spirit of the dead goes to the sky.
Seca look at the sky.
There’s nothing there but clouds.
Where is she now?
Wasn’t she said that she always wanted to be together?
Does she look at her from the sky and wacth her from above?
Or, she just look at the sky, just like Seca?
But..are there sky at where she goes?

Many years after still she never came.
Sometimes when she passed by to Yuni’s working place, feels like she’s still in there.
In case she’s stop by, maybe she’s still gonna see her.
She doesn’t want to admit that she’s not there anywhere, anymore.
To her it’s so ironic, that her wishes never came true.
While her parents didn’t want her to go and kept her with them.
But just when she was with them, she went further and unreachable…
When her parents afraid their daughter go away, she really go far far away and never comes back instead.
All of her life, she’ll never found one like Yuni again.
Seca always compares other person to her, and since Yuni, she never had a close friend.
Someone or something that we love too much just gone too easy.
When we’re afraid to lose something, God just took it.
Deep down inside Seca promise: she’ll never love someone too much again….

In memoriam, Yuni Anggraini